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How do you confuse a blonde? You don't. They're born that way. |
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How do ya paralyze a blonde from the neck down? Marry her. |
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How did the blonde die drinking milk? The cow fell on her. |
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How did the blonde burn her nose? Bobbing for french fries. |
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How can you tell if a blonde writes mysteries? She has a checkbook. |
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How can you tell when a FAX had been sent from a blonde? There is a stamp on it. |
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How can you tell if a blonde is a good cook? She gets the pop tarts out of the toaster in one piece. |
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What's the difference between a pit bull and a blonde with PMS? Lipstick. |
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Why does a blonde insist on him wearing a condom? So she can have a doggie bag for later. |
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What do you call a zit on a blonde's ass? A brain tumor. |
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Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence? To see what was on the other side. |
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Why did they stop doing the "WAVE" at BYU? Too many blondes were drowning. |
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Why did Clinton want to send blondes with PMS over to Iraq? They're mad enough to kill and they can retain water. |
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Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back? From *crawling* across the street when the sign said "DON'T WALK." |
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Why did the blonde keep a coat hanger in her back seat? In case she locks the keys in her car. |
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Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills |
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Why did the blonde want to become a vegetarian? Because she loved animals. |
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What are the worst six years in a blonde's life? Third Grade. |
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What is the difference between a blonde and a refrigerator? A refrigerator doesn't fart when you pull your meat out of it |
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What is the definition of gross ignorance? Blondes. |
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What is the definition of the perfect woman? A deaf and dumb blonde nymphomaniac whose father owns a bar. |
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