Limericks


~~ Page 13 ~~

There was a young fellow named Sweeney
Whose girl was a terrible meanie.
The hatch of her snatch
Had a catch that would latch
She could only be screwed by Houdini.



There was a young girl of Cape Cod
Who thought babes were fashioned by God,
But 'twas not the Almighty
Who hiked up her nightie
It was Roger the lodger, by God!



There was a cute girl from Kent
Who said she knew what it meant
When guys asked her to dine,
Gave her whiskey and wine.
She knew what it meant, that's why she went!



A dentist, young Doctor Malone,
Got a charming girl patient alone,
And in his depravity
He filled the wrong cavity
And my how his practice has grown!



There was a young man of Australia,
Who went on a wild bacchanalia.
He buggered a frog,
Two mice and a dog,
And a bishop in fullest regalia.



There once was a fellow named Howard,
Whose large tool was nuclear-powered.
While grabbing some ass,
He reached critical mass;
But think of the girl he deflowered!



There was a young man of Seattle,
Who bested a bull in a battle.
With fire and gumption,
He assumed the bull's function,
And deflowered a whole herd of cattle.



There was a young monk in Siberia
Whose morals were very inferior.
He jumped on a nun,
Which he shouldn't have done;
And now she's a Mother Superior.



There was a young trollop at Yale,
Who had verses tattooed on her tail;
And on her behind,
For the sake of the blind,
A duplicate version in Braille.



The new local cinematorium
Is not only a super sensorium.
But a highly effectual,
Heterosexual,
Mutual masturbatorium.



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