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There was a young girl of Samoa, Who determined that no man should know her. One young fellow tried, But she wriggled aside, And spilled all the spermatozoa. |
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When Lady Penelope swoons, Her tits pop out like balloons. Parker stands by, With a gleam in his eye, And pops them back in with warm spoons. |
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The was a young man from Dundee, Who was stung on the neck by a wasp. When asked "did it hurt", He said "No, not a bit, It can do it again if it wants." |
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There was a young Scotsman called Andy, Who knocked over his bottle of Shandy. He lifted his kilt, To wipe up what he spilt, And the barmaid said, "Blimey! That's handy!" |
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I had an ox as a friend, I used to call her Gen. This ain't absurd, You must have heard, Of good old oxy Gen. |
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On a bridge overlooking a ravine, Archibald was screwing Kathleen. The force of his lunge, Caused the whole bridge to plunge, The worst fucking disaster yet seen. |
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There was a young man from Lyme, Who couldn't get limericks to sound right. When asked why not, It was said that he thought, They were overly long and far to complex, possibly even dull. |
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A modest young girl named Oola, Once donned a grass skirt to dance Hula. A cow ate the grass, Exposing her ass, Now she's no longer modest but coola. |
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Some people come to sit and think, Others come to shit and stink. I come here to rest my balls and, Read the words upon the walls. |
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Here I lie in stinky vapor, Because some bastard stole the toilet paper, Shall I lie, or shall I linger, Or shall I be forced to use my finger. |
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