Page 99

A man and his wife were on a train passing through farm country. As the train slowed down they saw a bull mounting one cow after another. The wife turned to her husband and remonstrated. "Why aren't you men capable of doing things that way?" "My dear," he answered, "we can if you let us change cows each time!"

What do bungee jumping and sex with a prostitute have in common? 1) They both cost about $100. 2) They both last about 30 seconds. 3) And in both cases, if the rubber breaks, you're a dead man.

What is the difference between a Slut and a Bitch? A Slut sleeps with everyone, a bitch sleeps with everyone but you!

Why is sex like bridge? You either need or good partner or a good hand.

Do clever men make good husbands? Clever men don't become husbands!

What's the difference between a vision and a sight? When my wife gets dressed up for a party she looks like a vision and when she wakes up in the morning she's a sight.

Some people think life begins at conception, while others think life begins at birth. But some believe that life begins when the kid moves out and the dog he left behind dies.

A man is holding his wife's hand as she lays on her death bed. "Jerry, I, . . ., I have something to tell you before I pass on." "No, no, dear. Everything is forgiven now. All is well." "No, Jerry. I've been carrying this load for years now, and I must tell you. I, . . ., I've been unfaithful to you. I slept with your best friend, Phil. I'm so terribly sorry." "Yes, dear, I know. Why do you think I poisoned you?"

A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny. The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned. The husband was stunned for a while but then smiled and said, "It really works!"

Marriage is grand, divorce is about 10 grand.

To Page 98 Coop's Home Page To Page 100 Back To Dial A Joke-Page